I was raised to believe that the secret to happiness is to be interested in other people, be a good listener, and spend your time helping others. However, the happiest people I know are completely self-absorbed.

Eagerly they bombard me with every thought that has passed through their mind, every excruciating detail of their mundane little weekends, every boring incident involving the computer at work. I am left grabbing for the Prozac, and wondering where I went wrong. In our modern world, is self-obsession the only way to go?

Chris

Chris, ignorance may be bliss, but it isn't happiness. Happiness doesn't come from living in a closet or only looking at two colors in the rainbow.

People who can only talk about the weather or movies she hasn't seen, drive Tamara crazy. One cure is to gradually withdrawing from those people. That opens space in one's life for people who are vitally alive and growing.

By filling yourself up and growing, you have much to offer lively people, and they will be attracted to you as well. Build on the relationships you find pleasure in, and start pulling back from the other ones. A friend of mine once explained how he lost the sense of joy in his life, and how he got it back. He told me, "I forgot to dream."

Wayne